Noodle on This

What Questions

2012-01-30T09:06:00.000-05:00

I met with a client who manages a popular restaurant and is well liked by his team. He wants everyone on his team to shine, but some are inconsistent in their performance and it frustrates him. He dreads having to “be stern” with them because that’s not his style, but he has to address it. It’s eating him up inside.

I suggested he ask them ‘What’ instead of ‘Why’ questions.
-What causes you to do a good job some days and not others?
-What would it take for you to be consistent in your performance every day?
-What impact do you think your performance has on the rest of the team?
His immediate reaction was that maybe something or someone up the line was impacting their job on certain days. He also realized he does not know these employees as well as those who do a good job.

‘What’ questions usually generate a different response than ‘Why’ questions. I asked him, “What would happen if you met with these employees individually and let them know you are concerned about their performance and asked what you could do to help them be successful?” He thought for a moment, then said he felt a difference in his own reaction to ‘What’ instead of “Why..…”

This shifted his perspective about what is possible with these employees and with his natural management style. Asking ‘What....’ enables him to be himself to get to the heart of the situation. He doesn’t have to be the dreaded stern disciplinarian.

What would asking ‘What’ questions do for you? I encourage you to try it and see if you get a different reaction.

1,940 things to go

2012-01-29T22:54:00.000-05:00

Jack and I committed to giving away or throwing away 2012 items this year. At first I didn't think we could possibly get rid of that many things in our home, but I think it's definitely doable now. We're down to 1,940. I just cleaned out 30 boxes of tea (I used to drink it and many were gifts), and various other food items that were beyond their expiration date. I'd like to say getting rid of 2012 things was my original idea, but it came from our dear friend Ashley who is always challenging herself to measurable outcomes. This one intrigued me because we've been talking about cleaning out the garage (but haven't tackled it yet) for years. I knew having a # and date goal would incent me to let things go. It really has helped! We're keeping a tab in a polka-dot pad in the kitchen so we are reminded every time we see it. It's actually fun to look at things I would normally overlook and think -- we haven't used that, or I really don't like that, and let it go!

This works

2012-01-09T22:54:00.001-05:00

When I'm feeling stuck about something, want to move forward but something holds me back, I use these 5 steps to get my thoughts in order and get energized about what has to be done. I call it VW PAR. I've used this process for years, for myself and my clients, but gave it a name only last year. I'm passing it on so that you can benefit from it, too.

VWPAR

1) Visualize: Picture what you want to have happen, the result, not the problem. Picture yourself blasting past the challenge to a fantastic finish. See yourself finishing successfully, being the real you. What does that finish look like, feel like, sound like, taste like, smell like? Picture it in detail.

2) Write what you pictured. Start your sentences with "I am..." to put it in present tense, or "I have..." as if you already accomplished it. If you have a hard time starting, particularly if you don’t like to write, then write whatever comes to mind to get the junk out of your head. Once the surface stuff is out, you will be surprised at what comes to mind. Thoughts you would not have had otherwise will bubble up.

3) Prioritize: Write the actions you will take, then number them. Often it's not what you write first that has to be done first.

4) Act: Do what you prioritized.

5) Reflect: Think about what you accomplished. What went well, what you will do again or differently next time. Visualize yourself doing an outstanding job with it. Then start VWPAR for your next goal!

VWPAR has worked for my clients and for me for years. For big and little things. I hope it helps you, too.

New Year, Unlimited Possibilities

2012-01-01T21:55:00.003-05:00

I believe this year is going to be filled with wonderful opportunities and lots of growth for all of us. We just have to be open minded and willing to stretch our thinking about what is possible. This brief clip makes that very clear. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wOlTdkYXuzE&feature=related

Reflection Riding

2011-11-27T21:50:00.000-05:00

This is one of my favorite photos from our trip to Chattanooga last weekend, taken at Reflection Riding, a nature center surrounded by natural beauty. It reminds me of the transition from old to new, looking from what's current, dieing off, to the promise of new growth and beauty in the near future. We just have to step into it.

We were delighted by these 3 horses, led out from the barn in mid-afternoon. As soon as they were let loose, the two black ones threw themselves on the their backs, rolling in the grass, obviously enjoying themselves. After the white one munched a while he did the same. Happy to be free to do as they pleased.

Friends that do

2011-11-22T11:56:00.005-05:00

We had a wonderful weekend in Ooltewah, TN, with our dear friends Beverly & Bill. At 82 and 85, they are going strong, volunteering, caring for others who are ill, driving, cooking, delivering, playing cards and word games with friends, and very active in their church. What role models they are for active aging! Both are avid readers, enjoy going new places, discussing current events, maintain relationships with family and friends their age and younger (like us!). They are flattered that we want to spend time with them, yet we feel honored to be among their friends and hope we will be as vibrant as they are as we age. Their key to success? They always give of themselves, do for others, are open to others’ perspectives, willing to give the benefit of the doubt, pray for those they love and those they are concerned about. They say they don’t do anything special, but the difference is that they “do” – they don’t just think or talk about it, they take action. They never stop learning. That’s what I want to be like as I to grow up.

In Jamaica

2011-10-24T01:04:00.005-04:00

I'm in Jamaica again for another leadership practices inventory workshop with the police dept. My seat mate today on American Airlines was an entrepreneur who introduced Jamaican "Tastee patties" to Belize and his business is doing well. Took 2 years of working 14-15 hour days, six days a week, to get it up and running, and now, a few years later, he is able to live in Jamaica while his business thrives in Belize with his brother running the daily operation. I love hearing stories like his. I asked him what he does as a leader that makes his employees enjoy working with him. He said he pitches in wherever needed -- from cooking to cleaning up -- so his employees know what is important to him.

I'm looking forward to finding out what is important to the leaders in my workshop tomorrow.

Elevate the Leader in You

2011-07-28T11:43:00.005-04:00

Would you like to elevate the leader in you? Whether you lead only yourself or thousands, these four actions will help you be a successful leader.

1. Develop your vision for what is possible. See it in your mind’s eye in detail. Hear it. Smell it. Taste it. Feel it. Make it so clear, it makes you smile. Vision it every day for one minute. (Longer is better, but one minute can make difference.)

2. Communicate your vision. Talk about it in ways that stimulate others to want to help you make it happen. This is the hardest of the five practices of exemplary leaders, according to Kouzes and Posner in The Leadership Challenge. If talking about it feels uncomfortable, continue visioning. The clearer your vision, the easier it is to talk compellingly because you’ll be excited about its possibilities.

3. Collaborate. You can’t do it alone. One of my clients wants to make things happen and has great ideas and energy, but has not talked with his team about his vision for what is possible. Sure, he could do some things himself, but the outcomes will be enriched with collaboration. Plus, by collaborating with his team, he models what he wants them to do when working with other departments to make things happen for the good of the organization.

4. Believe in You. This is probably the most important. No one becomes truly successful without believing in themselves and their possibilities. You don’t have to be effusive. Just remind yourself every day that if you can think it, you can do it. Then go back to #1 and vision yourself doing it.

To learn more about what you can do to be a better leader of yourself and others, contact me to discuss coaching or arranging for one of my seminars:
Believe in You
Elevate the Leader in You
The Leadership Challenge
Streamline Your Time with Outlook

Keep in mind: “Becoming a leader is synonymous with becoming yourself. It is precisely that simple, and it is also that difficult.” ~Warren G. Bennis

Prioritizing saves time

2011-07-12T10:00:00.000-04:00

Are you doing what is most important today? You made a list, right? And prioritized it? I made mine but didn’t add the #s. So, each time I looked at it, I picked what to do next. What a waste of time! If I had prioritized it, I would have breezed through the top 5.

Prioritizing ensures that you tackle the most important first. As interruptions occur throughout the day, you quickly weigh whether they are more important than your next highest priority. If they are, take care of them and then return to your list. If a crisis hits and you can’t get back to what you planned, you’re OK because you already tackled 1, 2, 3.

Most people want to be more organized. One way to test if you’re on track is to check in with yourself. Listen to your inner voice. Is it saying “What are you doing?????” Or, “Sure, this is good. Do it.” Trust your inner guide to help you focus on what is most important. Sometimes shifting gears is the best thing to do. It just happened to me.

I started to write this message about my seminars: Believe in You, Elevate the Leader in You and The Leadership Challenge. But I was interrupted, and my inner guide encouraged me to shift my message to the importance of prioritizing.

Success pivots on relationships

2011-06-28T11:23:00.002-04:00

What do you do with nuggets of information you want to remember about people who are important to you? Colleagues, clients, potential clients and friends who mention something in an email you want to remember. Don’t rely on your memory. That nugget will get covered with a lot of other stuff before you want to retrieve it. Instead, jot it in your Contact for this person. Check the Contact before calling them or seeing them at a meeting, and you have a meaningful conversation starter. They will think you’re wonderful for remembering something they said.

4 easy steps to capture info from an email to a Contact:
1) Highlight, right click & Copy the nugget in the email
2) Right click on who the message is From and Look up their Contact. Or, Add to Contacts if you don’t already have one.
3) In the Contact’s notes space, type today’s date, right click and Paste.
4) Save & Close the Contact. You automatically return to that email in Inbox.

When you think about what has helped you be the success you are today, I bet having strong relationships is near the top of the list. Let Outlook remember for you.

This is tip #2 of 111 Ways to Streamline Your Time with Microsoft Outlook.

2011-06-15T13:35:00.001-04:00

"Two men looked out from prison bars. One saw mud, the other saw stars." What are you choosing to focus on today?

Who Knows What You Know

2011-05-17T11:03:00.004-04:00

I have to tell you about Roto Rooter. Our sink backed up twice last week. I Googled “fix clogged sinks Orlando,” and Roto Rooter topped the list with complimentary customer ratings. We remembered the old jingle from TV commercials and had an excellent experience with them years ago at Christmas, so I didn’t hesitate to call. “Experience” walked in the door when Ken arrived. He has been with Roto Rooter for 40 years. He assessed our situation, cleaned out the pipes, and we were clog free.

As he was leaving, I told Ken I would recommend Roto Rooter to anyone with clogged drains. He thanked me but said that was a problem. People think of Roto Rooter for cleaning drains but don’t think of them for other plumbing needs, like changing or fixing a faucet. He was right. I wou ld have called Walt’s Plumbing for something like that. It’s an ongoing marketing challenge because so many people think of them only as drain uncloggers.

It made me think of what Women Unlimited drums into the minds of their leadership program participants. It’s not what you know, it’s WHO KNOWS what you know that will get you ahead in this world. If you’re good at something but the right people don’t know how good you are at it, it doesn’t do you any good.

So, my message to you today is: What are you doing or what have you accomplished that others need to know? When you communicate confidently and comfortably about what you do or have accomplished, you are memorable. What do you want people to remember about you?

Do the right people know you do more than unclog pipes?

Your best time

2011-04-20T21:01:00.000-04:00

I did a seminar on “Streamline Your Time with Outlook” yesterday at Darden. I saw light bulbs go on when we talked about their best time of day. Many don’t pay attention to it, yet it is a simple, powerful approach to making progress toward your goals.

When is your best time of day? When are you your sharpest, clearest, brightest? What are you typically doing during your best time of day? I hope you’re not wasting it on mundane work. Use it to focus on something important to your growth and your career. Try this: block time on your calendar for your best time of day at least twice a week for the next month. By Memorial Day, you will have made progress toward something important to your success! And you will have created a new habit.

I gave the seminar participants an example of someone I used to work with. He realized his best time of day for reading and digesting new material, industry mags and reports was right after lunch. We thought he was closing his door to take a quick nap. But within weeks of closing his door almost every day for one-half hour after lunch, he was a different person in staff meetings. He had new ideas, was up to speed on the competition, knew what was happening in our industry, and had more energy about his job. All because he was tackling the pile of reading material he never had time for, yet knew his future success hinged on it.

Dedicate time, even a few minutes, during your best time of day to work on something you really want to accomplish.

Hell in the hallway

2011-03-29T08:51:00.003-04:00

I was talking with a colleague who is very unhappy where she works. I made her laugh with what my brother would say when he was down: "When one door closes, another opens ... but it’s hell in the hallway!"

Are you in a hallway? Is it frustration with your work, your role, your relationships, yourself?

Often in difficult times, we find out who we really are, what really matters, and what we really want to do.

Try this right now. Be a possibilities thinker. If you could be or do anything you really wanted, and you had no restrictions, if time, money, geography didn’t matter, what would you do? Mute the negative voice in your head. Listen to the positive one. What would you do?

Pay attention to that positive thought. What one step could you take toward it? You can work your way out of the hallway by focusing on possibilities.

You have more strength within you than you may give yourself credit for.

I received a card recently with a Helen Keller quote on the front that touched me. "Although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it." How true!

When my brother was down, he would do something for someone else. Reach out to someone in need. Volunteer. It would get him outside of his head. It always made him feel better. He died unexpectedly two years ago this April at 60 from a brain hemorrhage. We never know how long we have to do what we're here to do.

What hallway are you in? I'd love to help you achieve your possibilities.

Friends are Powerful

2011-03-18T17:01:00.007-04:00

You know that good friends make a difference in your life in many ways. They even impact the way you view your challenges.

Researchers asked participants to stand at the base of a steep hill and estimate how tough it would be to climb. Those standing with a friend gauged the ascent to be less steep compared with those who were alone. The longer the study participants had known their friends, the more gentle they estimated the incline to be.*

What could you do today to connect with a friend? It might turn one of your (or their) mountains into a mole hill.

Do you have grit?

2011-02-25T16:17:00.004-05:00

I bet you have more grit than you realize.

It’s when you believe in something and know you can’t do it all or make the big impact all at once. So you chip away at it. One step, then another. Until, with dedication and commitment, you achieve what you want…and more. It is how many significant accomplishments are achieved.

In MADE TO STICK, a Fast Company* article, Dan Heath and Chip Heath explain why some of the biggest victories are won an inch at a time:

"…grit – defined as endurance in pursuit of long-term goals and an ability to persist in the face of adversity – is a key part of what makes people successful. In a culture that values quick results – this qua rter’s numbers, this week’s weight loss, this month’s click-throughs – grit can be an under-appreciated secret weapon.

"Consider the difference grit makes even in a naturally gritty place like West Point. To be admitted, cadets must have impressive marks on multiple dimensions such as SAT scores, class rank, leadership ability, and physical aptitude. They’ve been tested as leaders. Yet during the first summer of training, a grueling period known as Beast Barracks, one out of every 20 cadets drops out.

"When Angela Duckworth of the University of Pennsylvania analyzed these incoming West Point cadets, she found that a very simple survey gauging grit – in which people self-assess on statements such as 'I finish whatever I begin' – could predict who would survive the Beast Barracks better than any existing West Point measure. 'Grit may be as essential as talent to high accomplishment,' D uckworth wrote.

"… Grit is not synonymous with hard work. It involves a certain single-mindedness. An ungritty prison inmate will formulate a new plan of escape every month, but a gritty prison inmate will tunnel his way out one spoonful of concrete at a time.”

Since reading this article, I’m making "I have grit" my mantra for the challenges I wish I could wave a magic wand and finish quickly. It has helped me make progress with a positive mindset. The trick is to keep your vision of success – you successfully completing whatever it is -- in mind, in crystal clear detail. A crystal clear vision of you as the success you want to be, brought to mind every day, will get you where you want to go.

What will grit help you accomplish?

Let me know if you would like to talk about it.

Thank You

2010-11-26T14:50:00.003-05:00

I have a thank you gift for you.
Every year at Thanksgiving, I like to send my past, present and future clients, colleagues and friends a thank you for the opportunities we’ve had to work together. It is such a joy helping you be the best you can be.

Throughout the year, my messages are about streamlining the way you work, deal with leadership challenges, relationships, etc. This time it’s about how to streamline YOU!

You know, we’re going to have many tasty treats over the next six weeks (Mmm!), and it’s easy to let the holiday hustle and bustle take precedence over taking care of ourselves. Yet we don’t want to start the new year off behind the 8 ball. Right? We want to look and feel our best. That’s important because when we feel good about ourselves, our interactions with others improve as well.

So my gift to you is to get Fit In The Kitchen!* Click to access.
Six simple yet powerful exercises to get energized, smooth out kinks, and ease stress at the end of your day. Doable at your kitchen sink! Do them 2-3 times a week and by January you will feel stronger, look trimmer and beam with more self-confidence.

You are the first to receive Fit in the Kitchen. Feel free to pass it on to your colleagues, friends, and family because they won’t hear about it anywhere else. Make it your gift to them! It works for men and women, all ages. In fact, the model in the photos is almost 60 and shaved her head to minimize hair care time. Now that’s one sure way to streamline!

I hope you will try Fit in the Kitchen and let me know how it works for you. Better yet, join me as I make the commitment to do this routine 3 times each week throughout this holiday season. (Tip to self: remove chocolate from kitchen.) If you have questions regarding the exercises, contact Peggy. She will be happy to respond via email.

Let’s start 2011 feeling good about ourselves in every way: Physically, Intellectually, Emotionally, Spiritually ... PIES! Mmmm.

*Peggy K is a seasoned personal trainer in NY who offers customized programs for those who want to be physically strong and agile. A key feature is improving posture to optimize appearance and function for each individual. She’s not a boot camper. Her approach is thoughtful, considerate of your physicality, and she has a particular interest in working with women concerned about osteoporosis. See a sampling of what she offers at Fit in the Kitchen.

Room to Read

2010-06-27T04:54:00.003-04:00

I just finished reading a very moving and motivating book about an international marketing executive who takes a vacation for the first time in nine years and has a life-changing experience. He intentionally goes to the other side of the world to climb in the Himalayas so that he's outdoors, physically challenged, and can't be reached by cell phone. A visit to a poor rural school in Nepal shocks him when he sees they have less than a dozen books, left-behinds from mountain climbers, locked away as too valuable for the kids to handle. He promises to return with kids' books the next year. As a boy, he spent countless hours in the library and can't imagine these kids not having anything to read. Their future is bleak, just as it has been for their parents.

Email to friends and family in Australia and U.S. requesting used kids' books sets in motion a tremendous outpouring of support for his vision to bring books to this and other poor schools. That's just the beginning. He quits his lucrative, high-level job with Microsoft. Splits with his girlfriend (she prefers their life filled with business perks, not donating time and money to help poor kids in rural third-world countries learn to read). Moves on with his dream, creating a highly respected non-profit, "Room to Read," that donates books and raises funds to open schools in the poorest areas of Nepal, Vietnam, Cambodia, India, Sri Lanka (after the devastating tsunami) and Africa. John Wood travels the globe with his passion to improve the lives of poor children. Donors believe in his mission because a high percentage of donations goes directly to the schools and scholarships. Scholarships for girls is a key ingredient because he sees first hand that girls are not valued in poor countries, yet they will change the future through their mothering if they are educated.

I'm glad a friend lent me "Leaving Microsoft to Change the World" by John Wood. It reinforces my belief that each of us can make a difference if we want to. It doesn't have to be this big....what is your Room to Read?

It's been 3 weeks since

2010-03-31T11:02:00.003-04:00

Mom died. For ten years I wondered if she’d go all the way to the end of the Alzheimer’s path. I hoped she wouldn’t. She did. It was an unexpected blessing.

Here’s what I learned:
- connect with others along the path and you'll handle your own challenges better.
- repeat to yourself often: “This, too, will pass.”
- treat persons with Alzheimer’s with dignity and love for they are still in there.
- friendships are uplifting in times of distress.
- family and friends far away can feel very close.
- belief in life after death is a true comfort.
- we are only a blip on the screen in relation to our universe.
- email works as well as a card or letter when expressing heart-felt emotion.
- God has a plan for every one of us – be receptive to it.

The morning mom died, Jack’s car broke down on his way to work. This is rare. I was asleep when he called and asked if I’d take him to work. AAA was on its way to take the car. I agreed to be there in 10-15 minutes. Flew out of bed, got dressed, told my sister I’d keep going to mom’s since Jack’s office is half-way there. She said, “I’ll go with you.” We drove off looking ragged. We’d been with mom til after midnight and left her sleeping comfortably.

Taking Jack to work got us to her earlier than we would have on our own. When we arrived her breathing sounded awful, like an old percolator struggling. I held the phone to her mouth for the hospice nurse to hear. She was surprised that mom had progressed to that point so quickly. A couple of drops of morphine calmed her breathing. We held her hand, talked to her, prayed for her. After an hour her breathing slowed, continued gently, then stopped. Then we watched her carotid artery in her neck beat slower and slower til it stopped. She was gone.

I never thought I’d say this, but it was a privilege to experience those last moments with her. We’d been through so much together, it felt natural to be with her as she took her last breaths. It was peaceful. We know her spirit lives on in heaven. She’s happier now than ever. And she’s keeping an eye on us, as she always has.

We learned so much from our experiences with Alzheimer’s disease. I wouldn’t trade it for any other way to go. She was not in pain. Her pleasant smile warmed hearts. Our connections with friends, family and caregivers grew stronger. It was a blessing in many ways.

###

USE it or LOSE it

2010-01-23T13:34:00.005-05:00

I want to tell you about my friend Ashley Allen's approach to new year resolutions. Rather than naming specific resolutions, she creates a theme for the year that is easy to remember, applies to many dimensions in life, and is trackable. I like her approach so much, I adopted it myself!

The theme for 2010 is: USE it or LOSE it.

Ashley set specific goals to USE and LOSE. I've given away clothes and books no longer used and started (again) using my gym membership for yoga classes. If I don't use my strength and flexibility, I'll surely lose it!

What could you USE this year that would benefit you?
> Talents, Skills, Habits
> Develop strengths instead of focusing on weaknesses
> Streamline systems
> Crystallize your future dreams

What could you LOSE that would benefit you?
> Limiting beliefs
> Negative habits
> Clutter (mental and physical)

USE it or LOSE it
We often create invisible walls that keep us from being who we know in our hearts we are meant to be. We limit ourselves. A client once said, "I wish I could stop being afraid." What are you afraid of? Success? Even fear can be a motivator for good.

You can feel much better about yourself by the end of 2010. What will it take?

Start today. Repeat to yourself: USE it or LOSE it. It will help you make decisions.

I'd love to hear what you USE and LOSE so that you can be who you want to be this year!

If you'd like to receive my monthly messages (motivational, time savers, tips on elevating the leader in you), click here to subscribe to Mary's Valuable Tips.

I look forward to hearing from you!

What’s Bugging You?

2009-07-23T16:00:00.004-04:00

Is this you? Are you trying harder than ever but not getting where you want to go?

A True Story *

I'm sitting in a quiet room at the Millcroft Inn, a peaceful place hidden back among the pine trees about an hour out of Toronto. It's just past noon, late July, and I'm listening to the desperate sounds of a life-or-death struggle going on a few feet away.

There's a small fly burning out the last of its short life's energies in a futile attempt to fly through the glass of the windowpane. The whining wings tell the poignant story of the fly's strategy -- try harder.

But it's not working.

The frenzied effort offers no hope for survival. Ironically, the struggle is part of the trap. It is impossible for the fly to try hard enough to succeed at breaking through the glass. Nevertheless, this little insect has staked its life on reaching its goal through raw effort and determination.

This fly is doomed. It will die there on the windowsill.

Across the room, ten steps away, the door is open. Ten seconds of flying time and this small creature could reach the outside world it seeks. With only a fraction of the effort now being wasted, it could be free of this self-imposed trap. The breakthrough possibility is there. It would be so easy.

Why doesn't the fly try another approach, something dramatically different? How did it get so locked in on the idea that this particular route, and determined effort, offer the most promise for success? What logic is there continuing, until death, to seek a breakthrough with "more of the same"?

No doubt this approach makes sense to the fly. Regrettably, it's an idea that will kill.

"Trying harder" isn't necessarily the solution to achieving more. It may not offer any real promise for getting what you want out of life. Sometimes, in fact, it's a big part of the problem.

If you stake your hopes for a breakthrough on trying harder than ever, you may kill your chances for success.

~~~~~~~~~~

What is your windowpane? Step back and look around for the door. Are you trying harder to make a break through and getting frustrated because your efforts are not paying off?

I'd love to hear your thoughts on this.

~~~~~~~~~~

* By Price Pritchett in his 36-page book
You²: A High-Velocity Formula for Multiplying Your Personal Effectiveness in Quantum Leaps
http://www.pritchettnet.com
This excerpt is used with full permission from PRITCHETT, LP. All rights are reserved.

We Judge by Appearance

2009-04-22T15:51:00.002-04:00

We’ve all heard this many times before: don’t judge others by their appearance. Yet we still do it. Evidence the recent blast into stardom of Susan Boyle on ‘Britain’s Got Talent.’ She’s been featured on UTube (about 100 million views), on TV, in print, online, and emails are still flying around the world. Her voice coach worries that she’ll be lost in the PR swirl. (Yes, she has a coach.)

From laughter and ridicule to amazement and standing ovation in just a few moments. Many shed tears as they watched and listened to her surprisingly beautiful rendition of one of my favorite songs, “I Dreamed a Dream” from Les Miserables. It’s heart warming to know that people can embrace someone so quickly, yet scary to think that just moments before she was openly ridiculed. I’m sure you’ve experienced similar examples of how fickle we can be.

Last week, at the memorial Mass of a friend who died unexpectedly, we learned that she, too, had talents most of us had never known. She had dementia, yet at some point wrote Haiku. I was so impressed with her catchy 3-lined poetry in 5-7-5 syllables -- descriptive, touching, clever words on paper that she could not have verbalized -- I pass these gems on to you, in her memory. The first two refer to her love of the performing arts.

The houselights have dimmed;
A hush descends upon us.
The curtain rises.

The stars are starring
In a play called "Heavenly".
The audience bows.

Her sense of humor and appreciation of the double entendre shine through:
In the streetlights glow
Shadows stretch before my eyes.
Then...it dawned on me.

Perhaps her writing talent could have been developed if she had had a coach to encourage her to stretch and practice, just as Susan Boyle’s coach did for her.

What are your hidden talents? What could you develop if you spent time practicing and stretching yourself? If a couple of things popped into your mind, think about taking action on one of them. You may surprise yourself and everyone you know with what you can do. Even if you don't look like you could.
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Be Brief, Be Bright, Be Gone

2009-03-18T14:28:00.001-04:00

As I thought about writing this post, I wanted to keep it brief and useful. That brought to mind a VP I worked with years ago. He was sharp, organized and always on top of his game. Well respected, too. His top managers were a lot like him. They were known for being team players, go getters and always said what they thought in a constructive way. It made me think that we all can work on making our points more succinctly. And in a positive way.

Everyone’s attention span is short. Whether you’re writing email, speaking at a meeting or making a presentation, keep that in mind.

Every time I write, I go back and remove at least 10% of the words. And then I do it again. That’s an old tip from Zinsser’s “On Writing Well.” I’m amazed at how wordy I can be. I’ve already cut much more than 10% of what I’ve written here!

It’s easy to rattle on. But I’m committed to keeping this post brief. The VP I mentioned was known for wanting his team to make their points quickly and succinctly. They said to be successful with him, you had to “be brief, be bright, be gone!” He didn’t say those words, they adapted that style because he valued it. I’ve never forgotten it.

If you want those you communicate with to be brief, bright and complete with their messages to you, set the example. When emailing, include the action you want taken in the first lines of your message. Make sure your tone is friendly, not dictatorial. You may even want to indicate ACTION: in your first line or two. You’ll be surprised at how others adapt your style. If you write long, wordy messages, you’ll often get that style in return. If you write clear, concise, appreciative messages, you’ll get them in return as well. You train others how you want to be treated. Try it.

OK, I’m gone. Let me know how it goes!
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